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why did the chicken cross the road

  1. gosh

    3,857 posts.
    WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

    PHILLIP RUDDOCK
    I don't care why the chicken crossed the road it should be sent back to
    where it came from. Who knows what might happen if we keep letting any old
    chicken cross the road. We could be inundated with them. Send them to the
    farmer up the road a bit and we can pay him to deal with the problem.

    JEFF KENNETT
    If the chicken did cross the road it should have been fitted with an etag
    and should pay the same toll as all other road users.

    STEVE BRACKS
    Regional chickens should have the same opportunities to cross roads as
    chickens living in Melbourne.

    JOHN HOWARD
    The chick never crossed the road. And it was not forcibly removed from its
    mother! Anyway, that's a matter for the states and is of no interest to
    us. The united nations should butt out.

    KIM BEASLEY
    There WAS a chicken and it DID cross the road. This is a deliberate act by
    the government to hide the fact that chickens continue to cross Australian
    roads.

    NATASHA STOTT-DESPOJA
    What if it was not a chicken but a bantam? Minority sectors of our
    community shouldn't be discriminated against based purely on the size of
    their eggs and legs.

    EVELYN SCOTT
    To demonstrate a commitment to reconciliation with Indigenous chickens.

    PETER COSTELLO
    Accordingly to documentation submitted to the Live Foods Processing
    Authority, the chicken in question was uncooked at the time of its journey
    and therefore will not incur a GST charge. However, if that chicken
    actually crossed the road for profit, regardless of its raw/cooked status,
    the road crossing would be considered by the ATO to be a service for which
    GST will be imposed.

    PAULINE HANSON
    Please explain.

    ROBERT DE NIRO
    Are you telling me the chicken crossed that road? Is that what you're
    telling me?

    MARTIN LUTHER KING
    I envision a world where all chickens, be they black or white or brown or
    red or speckled, will be free to cross roads without having their motives
    called into question.

    GRANDPA
    In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us
    that the chicken crossed and that was good enough for us.

    REV FRED NILE
    Because the chicken is gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the
    plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the 'other
    side'. That's what 'they call it: the 'other side'.

    CAPTAIN JAMES T KIRK
    To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

    FOX MULDER
    You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have
    to cross before you believe it's true?

    HANSIE CRONJE
    What if I could guarantee that it won't get to the other side?

    FREUD
    The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road
    reveals your underlying sexual insecurity. How do you feel about your
    mother?

    THE C.I.A.
    Who told you about the chicken? Did you see the chicken? There was no
    chicken. Please step into the car.

    EINSTEIN
    Whether the chicken crossed the road or whether the road moved beneath the
    chicken depends upon your frame of reference?

    BILL CLINTON
    I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken?
    Could you define the word 'chicken'.

    HOMER SIMPSON
    Mmmm, Chicken.

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