the way children see things...

  1. 2,092 Posts.
    The Way Children See Things...

    NUDITY I was driving with my three young children one warm summer
    evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved.
    She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my
    5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a
    seat belt!


    HONESTY My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me
    he'd dropped his toothbrush in the toilet.. So I fished it out and threw
    it in the garbage.. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran
    to my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said
    with a charming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then,
    'cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago.

    OPINIONS On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a
    Note From his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this
    child are not necessarily those of his parents."

    KETCHUP A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out of the
    jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old
    daughter to answer the phone. "It's the minister, Mummy," the child said
    to her mother. Then she added, "Mummy can't come to the phone to talk to
    you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

    MORE NUDITY A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the
    women's Locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks,
    with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy
    watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter haven't you ever
    seen a little boy before?"

    ELDERLY While working for an organisation that delivers lunches to
    elderly shut-ins I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon
    rounds. The various appliances of old age, particularly the canes,
    walkers and wheelchairs, unfailingly intrigued her. One day I found her
    staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself
    for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and
    whispered, "The Tooth Fairy will never believe this!"

    DRESS-UP A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When
    she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't
    wear that suit." And why not, darling?" he asked. "You know that it
    always gives you a headache the next morning."

    DEATH While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our
    minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar
    wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and
    cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the
    deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers,
    and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his
    Father always said: "Glory be unto the Faaaather, and unto the Sonnn,
    and into the hole he gooooes."

    SCHOOL A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm
    just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't
    write and they won't let me talk!"

    BIBLE A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he
    Fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the
    Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old
    leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what I
    found", the boy called out." What have you got there, dear?" With
    astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's
    underwear.




 
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