You have always avoided this question, surely you are not ashamed?
I would like to ask you a genuine question, if you are willing to answer honestly. How did you come to believe in him? Were you brought up in this as a child? Did you embrace spirituality and then go looking for something that suited your lifestyle? Were you influenced by friends? .
I am genuinely curious how you fell for this false prophet that you now look to and even place above Yeshua, which is bizarre to me.