the best irish toast

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    John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said "Heres to spending the rest of me
    life, between the legs of me wife!"
    That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night! He
    went home and told his wife Mary, "I won the prize for the best toast of the
    night," she said "Aye, did ye now, and what was your toast?"
    John said "Heres to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside
    me wife." "Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said.
    The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street
    corner. The man chucked leeringly and said, "John won the prize the other
    night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary"
    She said, "Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised meself. You know, he's
    only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the
    other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come."
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