Speeding ticket

  1. 1,322 Posts.
    While I was driving down the road yesterday (only 10 kph over), I noticed a cop with a radar gun sitting on top of a bridge.

    The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car and asked me, "What's the hurry?"

    I replied, "I'm late for work."

    "Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"

    I responded, "I'm a rectum stretcher."

    The cop said "What's a rectum stretcher, and what does a rectum stretcher do?"

    I said, "Well, I start with one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then my whole hand, then I work until I can get both hands in there and then I slowly stretch it until it's about 6 foot wide."

    The cop asked me, "What the hell do you do with a 6 foot as*hole?"

    I simply replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him on top of a bridge.."

    The ticket - $95 dollars.

    The look on his face - PRICELESS.
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