Revised Alphabet : A is for apple, and B is for boat, That used...

  1. 2,158 Posts.

    Revised Alphabet :
    A is for apple, and B is for boat, That used to be right, but now it won't float!
    Age before beauty is what we once said. But let's be a bit more realistic instead.




    Now The New Alphabet:

    A's for arthritis; B's the bad back, C's the chest pains,perhaps car-di-ac?


    D is for dental decay and decline, E is for eyesight, can't read that top line!
    F is for farting and fluid retention, G is for gut droop, which I'd rather not mention.


    H high blood pressure--I'd rather it low; I for incisions with scars you can show.
    J is for joints, out of socket, won't mend,K is for knees that crack when they bend.
    L 's for libido, what happened to sex? M is for memory, I forget what comes next.
    N is neuralgia, in nerves way down low; O is for osteo, bones that don't grow!


    P for prescriptions, I have quite a few, just give me a pill and I'll be good as new!
    Q is for queasy, is it fatal or flu? R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.


    S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears, T is for Tinnitus; bells in my ears!
    U is for urinary; troubles with flow; V for vertigo, that's 'dizzy,' you know.


    W for worry, now what's going 'round? X is for X ray, and what might be found.
    Yfor another year I'm left here behind,Z is for zest I still have-- in my mind!


    I've survived all the symptoms, my body's deployed,
    And I'm keeping twenty-six doctors fully employed!



    HAVE A GREAT DAY !

    If you cannot afford a Doctor, go to the airport- you'll get a free X-Ray and breast exam,
    and- if you mention "ISIS"you'll get a free colonoscopy.



 
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