My favourite's from a book called, Disorder in the American Courts

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    My favourite's from a book called, Disorder in the American Courts, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters.

    1, Attorney:

    What is your date of birth?

    Witness:

    July 18th.

    Attorney:

    Which year?

    Witness:

    Every year.

    2, Attorney:

    Are you sexually active?

    Witness:

    No, I just lie there.

    3, Attorney

    : Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

    Witness:

    No.

    Attorney:

    Did you check for blood pressure?

    Witness:

    No.

    Attorney

    : Did you check for breathing?

    Witness:

    No.

    Attorney:

    So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

    Witness:

    No.

    Attorney:

    How can you be so sure, Doctor?

    Witness:

    Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

    Attorney:

    I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?

    Witness:

    Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practising law.
 
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